Birthday Message: I want you Back

"And yeah, to Twist (again) because you became my comfort when I was sad. You became my best friend here in Lyce, Nobody can replace your Ideas, your visions (really?), your artwork (cool, hehe), and your humor, I became much more than an otaku, really!"

- Birthday Message, 2006


"Now, this last words will be dedicated to you, Yes, You, You know who you are, I know you are in pain and in hate because of what I did to you. But I know from my innermost soul that you needed a person who will listen to you, As you have said it before ...

"You're the one who listens to me regardless, you let me vent my frustrations on you....I'm learning from you too, you know. Its 'cause you're around that I know where I want to be."

I am still here, accepting you with open arms. I have already forgiven you from the start. Now it's your turn. It's time to listen to your heart, eat your pride, and rethink about what you had done to me."

- Birthday Message, 2008


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Ever since I first met you, I was so blown away, I never forgot every inch and every second that we bonded, I never felt more secured in my life.

But since we went to a war, I cried endlessly, I had been depressed. I cannot cope up, And I didn't know what to do.

But I will never give up

I may have lost you, But I will never give up on a friendship. If you told me to get a life, I will get a life.

And that is my Friendship with you.

A lot of my friends believed I never failed them. I believe them. I believe too that I WAS NOT the failure of our friendship.

I had my shortcomings, and you know that.

But you never admitted you had your shortcomings. I tried to understand you, and you basically knew that.

But you still did not change.

Now, I will try whatever means to get my old friend back. I have nothing to lose, because I believe my real friends will understand me.

I tried to move on, but all I got was nothing.

From now on, I will not stop. I will promise myself to bring this friendship back. Whatever the odds, whatever the consequences.

Even if the cost of it is my own dignity, and my life.



I want you back dude. I really need you as a bestfriend.


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That is my birthday message, A lot shorter and no thank-yous. But It still has that wish that I really long for since that day in 2007.


-HeAdIn'-OuT!-

December Thoughts: Thank you for the Torment

Thank you to all the people who made me realize that I am such a loser for this year, if not because of you, You made me look like a prime jerk.

Thank you to all the people who made me look bad for the past year. If not because of you, I almost killed myself.

Thank you to all the people who called me by such names as a fag, stalker and etc., because I almost lost my sense of identity.

Thank you to all the people who told me I am pathetic, because you made me feel like one.

Thank you to all the people who told me I am a liar, because that remark tagged me as an inconceivable liar to the community.

Thank you to all the people who tried to stall everything in my path, because I was not able again to revive a friendship and do my job freely as the Chief Anime Correspondent.

and Thank you to all the people who told me I failed. because right now, I failed again for this year, my 21st in my life.

If you knew I was the one talking to you, then you should not reply, If you reply, then it meant that you denied everything you did to me. A double-edged sword when you read this post.

For the past year, I was subjected to all the ups and downs of my life. And those people who continually torment me are one of those people who really influenced me truly.

I only knew a few people who really believe in me, and I know them all.

And I want to tell you something before I end this post. Then, as always, I will still continue to do my job as the Chief Anime Correspondent, and I will still continue to pursue this friendship even if the cost of this is my own dignity and my own life.

-HeAdIn'-OuT!-